Holiday Vacation

We are in Florida for the first time during the Holidays and having a lovely time.
We've had sushi, visited the zoo, and spent some quality time with family.

Aiden really enjoyed the Gulf Breeze Zoo, but I made some friends as well...

I can take him home right???

And this llama side eye'd me like my boxer does....

I'm watching you....

And Bunny and I learned first hand what a giraffe tongue feels like...

Happy Christmas!!!!

It has been a pretty insane, awesome, stressful, and chaotic year.  I've had some really wonderful moments during this holiday season and some really not so wonderful moments, but looking back on 2013, I think of it as one of the most transforming of my life.

Of course, being a mother has pretty much changed everything.

How can you not love this guy?????

I have different goals, different wants, different priorities and yet, even with all the stress, I don't think I've ever been happier, this kid is amazing.  He makes me want to be a better person every single day and he makes me want the world to be a better place for him to live in...

That has been hard for me, learning that while I can maintain my strength of conviction about all of the things I believe in, but understand that petty political squabbles amount to absolutely nothing in the end. Avoiding caustic and unproductive arguments while also working hard to fight for things I believe in because I truly think that working to fight hate, poverty, and ignorance will make a better world for my son is difficult because while I do not want to just mindlessly argue with someone who does not want to even look at an issue from a different perspective... I do want to at least open a door to eradicate misconceptions and intolerance.  I know a lot of people who hold a great deal of animosity for the poor, for other races, for other religions, or anyone who is "different" and I just don't want to say I willingly lived in a world full of that and passed it on to my son without trying to make a change.  

I want to show my son that when he looks at another person, the only thing he should feel is compassion...not threat, not animosity, but understanding because no matter what, we are all the same.  Its not about if they get a welfare check or what they do with it, its not about what they believe, who they love, or how they feel...its about people accepting people for the flawed and amazing creatures we are.  

2013 has been a year of being closer to my husband, learning to deal with financial struggles to get what we truly want, and making our little family unit work.  In the end, although we have a large number of amazing people who love us and support us, we want to be us and happy with our choices.  I've had a hard time accepting the fact that currently I am contributing very little financially which causes us to have some really stressful moments.  Going from working full time and bringing home a decent check to nothing because we've decided that education and my pursuit of that education is paramount has caused me to continually become anxious about a lack of significant contribution.  I spend a lot of time reading and having to isolate myself to get a mounting pile of school work done in order to make the grades I feel I need to succeed. (A's) I feel guilty because at night I have to lock myself up in a room and miss out on family time...I feel even more guilty when bills come in and I know we are in such a tight spot because I am in school.  At the same time, I'm almost done with Graduate School and I've maintained a nearly perfect GPA (I've made one B).  I think I am producing some of the best work of my academic career and I think I am only getting better with time, my passion for history, my passion to keep going is growing and I truly desire to keep that momentum because I want my son to have an understanding and an appreciation for history that I fear is fading in society. 

2013 has been a time of change regarding other relationships in my life.  Most of my friendships have changed over the past year, some for better and some not, but I think all in a productive way, a way that will move forward and make everyone involved happier.  

2013 made me realize how much I miss traveling, or being in a bigger place... I want to move.  I do not want to move because I loathe the place I am, I've actually started to have an appreciation for some of the gems of culture and awesome in my small place on the planet... From Ocmulgee to the public Fishing hole a bit south of here... This is not a hopeless or horrible place, its just not for me.  I plan on working really hard towards my goal of moving to a city.  

London, England 2011

Ok the one above there... one can dream can't she....

I hope all of my readers (all 3 of you) and my friends and family have a Happy Happy Holidays and a roaring and awesome 2014. 

......

I really really really really need a stress free vacation

I'm going to do something I don't usually do...

As I was reading facebook today I came across this article.

A woman is tired of violence against women in TV

(Warning there are TV spoilers in that article if you watch Sons of Anarcy)

I agree with her theme, that violence against women in Television has got a bit out of hand and its sometimes pretty disgusting... but this is a really really really bad example and kind of silly.

First... if you don't like violence in Television, it would probably behoove you not to watch Sons of Anarchy which is about a criminal biker gang.

Second... If you've watched Sons of Anarchy for any amount of time, you know the writers of the show based it off of Hamlet....which is violent and not the most friendly towards women....

Third... If you've read Hamlet, you know...that in the end...everybody dies.

OK...
That being said.
This is the end of the season before the last season....
And they are going to end it with something big to lead to the BIG final season where everything spins into chaos and Jax (Hamlet) loses his mind and destroys everyone in his path...
Including Ophelia (Tara)
So, if you lose your respect for TV all together because of a violent female death on television...why is it the one you knew was coming? Unless you don't really watch Sons of Anarchy or you've never read Hamlet.

I don't know...this seems a bit off to me.  There are a lot of other shows you can pull up if you want to pull the violence and rape of women is out of control...maybe the episodes of Sons of Anarchy where Jax's mother is Gang raped might be more appropriate...
But Ophelia being drowned  (and I know it was more brutal than that but this is for connection purposes) happened in the 16th century, I think our audiences can handle it.

And Then There Was Break....

I am going to celebrate this month I have off... a month without deadlines and books to cram into an impossible schedule while frantically scribbling notes on post-its in a futile attempt to remember everything from a four hundred page book read over the span of three days...

It was a hellish semester.

Now, I adore school...to a strange degree, I love learning, I love research, and I love writing... but I also love my family and watching my baby boy grow up into a little man who has managed to now point at Ewoks in Star Wars and call them izzzieeeee (Which is Aiden language for Lizzie, our three year old Boxer). 

I learned a lot this Semester though and I got angry a lot... that is what happens when your classes are:

History of the South, Contemporary America, and Seminar in History: 1963.

I've never had a more disturbing, depressing, and anger inducing reading list and in a way, it didn't change me, but it influenced me...

So what do I have planned over the Holiday besides spending time with the people I love and taking it easy?
A book on Salem, Doris Kearns Goodwin's new book, and some Howard Zinn (just to make my father in law cringe a little...he he he, its all out of love).

History is important to me. I always talk about it, I usually am thinking about it, and I want... I truly want people to know about it... they don't have to obsess over it or love it, but I want people to know it.

Only a few more classes and I will be done with my graduate degree...and I really hope I can get into a PhD program, I so want to keep going.  

Quick Thought

I am reading a book on George Wallace for a paper.
I do not like George Wallace.
that is all.